I really don't understand how a person can be wrong all the time. Even when i have the evidence that i am right but i am still wrong. WTF is wrong with this world?
I have been raised to tell the truth and its very bad to lie. In reality, to tell the truth is wrong. It more often than not gets you into trouble. So i have been raised to get into trouble :x
When talking to a certain individual, i am always left with a feeling of guilt and that i have wronged them. In some cases, i would even end up in tears. It is wrong to ask and want for the best. What you see with your own eyes (even before i was wearing glasses) is not real, is not the truth. What you perceive to be wrong is not wrong, in fact, you are told that its a good thing. Have i been growing up on Pluto or something? I feel completely lost to have my beliefs and what i was taught to be untrue, wrong and not how things are supposed to be.
Giving whatever you can afford to someone, ie the best that you can do is also no good. They want the bad things which in your mind should stay away from. You want to save them from the darkness and yet they are attracted and want to go down that path. Why do you not want to believe that what i see you do is wrong? How do i convince you? What more can i do? I feel quite lost of what i can do more to help you see that what you crave for is actually wrong. How i wish i can project what i imagine would happen if you really do what you want to do, so that you will understand better what i am trying to turn you away from.
The more i think, the more fault i find with myself. The more i find the sadder i get. The more i want to do, the more trouble i get myself into, the deeper the shit and mess which i have no clue how to clean up. I feel very much suffocated by my guilt and wrongdoings, no nightmares but i would just suddenly wake up in the middle of the night, as if the guilt wants to prevent me from having a good night's sleep. My baggy eyes are getting heavier ...
It seems like i found a way for an uninterrupted night's sleep, BEER! Though i dislike the bitter taste and burping, i can KO for more than 7 hours. Whisky/Brandy/VSOP though supposedly stronger keeps me awake more than my normal interrupted sleep. Hopefully i will get another chance to KO this weekend, a much needed rest for a supposed guilty person.
KL Library ... the coolest place to be in town
6 months ago
8 thoughts:
:) well I've been in that situation many times too. From my experience the most you could do is give your advice or opinion and leave the execution to the other party. He/She should know best what to do and people do learn better when they hit the wall.
relationship or family problem??
do not put so much weigh or guilt on urself, as long u did ur best or the right thing is enuff. Wheter ppl return in kind or not is one thing. Some ppl just need from mistakes to understand what is wrong..
too much liquor hard to sleep i feel. Just need the right amount for a good sleep..haha
Kevin : Some things don't really have a U-turn, like if you are jailed, you will have to carry a different IC, though an unbias person will not judge him/her by this but he/she is forever scarred by this. Prevention is better than cure and furthermore, there is also no coming back from death AFAIK.
Anene : Both have their unique problems.
Guilt is like a ghost which persist to haunt you until you can find a way to exorcise it. So far i have not find myself to be in the right to confirm that what i was told was wrong is in fact right like how i know it should be.
Let's just hope there is still stock from the CNY booze for me this weekend :)
I agreed with what was said by Kevin. Its the same when parents told you that this thing are not right, just bcoz u have not been hit the wall, you will not understand "What, why and how is it wrong to proceed le?" Just remember that you have n tried the first move to give the "best" (as in your mind) advice to a person, whether u r right or wrong at the end for that particular situation, some might thank you and some not.
There are people ask for advice / after listen to your advice, they do not follow / accept it.
I have a friend who always think ahead of me, give advice as he do not want me to hit the wall blindly. Maybe he is exposed to the community earlier than me, tends to self rated to be "graduated from community" (if you can translate this to Cantonese =.=) No matter who he advise to, he would always end with a statement "this is what i think n the best i can advice, for ur own good and decision making, however final decision is still on your hand, as long as you will not ended with regret/cry on your choices . Most important do not blame i din advice you from the beginning."
Yes this works especially well for adults and i do agree, that to know what is pain, you really have to experience it yourself to know its danger.
There are extra responsibilities for parents to ensure that their children are not led to believe wrong is right. I am frustrated by the people who are trying to brainwash my child to be like their naughty and uncontrollable (in my mind) children. I am not claiming to be perfect BUT i have seen first hand the result of their teachings and i do not like one bit of it nor do i want to see my child to grow up in their mold.
Yes, i do agree that children now are more intelligent and have more brain power to decide what is good and bad BUT if the direction is wrong from the beginning then what is 'good' is bad and what is 'bad' is good.
p/s : Most of the things mentioned in this post are about what i see and fear for my son.
Ur son?? In that case, how old is ur son to determine what is wrong what is right at his age?
Influence from media, people and environment surroundings are the factors that lead to his change / act of behaviour.
It all takes time. Be patient to ur son lar.
Sometimes, there are things that can'e be explained throught RIGHT and Wrong. Who knows what is right and what is wrong? Your mind does. So?
What I know is, you can't just stand there and do nothing, you are trying hard to show someone that what he/she is craving for is wrong. But, it is not within your control, as you said, people perceive things through various ways.
You are a daddy now, your maturity will guide you to the right choice if you believe on it. And, there is a way for you to have a good sleep instead of drinking alcohol.
Tense all your muscles from head to toes SLOWLY, breath in.
Relax your muscles from head to toes SLOWLY again, breath out.
Repeat repeat and repeat.
ok, this is a phycical way.
Let's go to the mental way.
I know many things will hurl in your mind. What you have to do is, focus on something, eg, your breathing. Do you breath fast? Exhale more or inhale more?
Once there is somethingcame into your brain, let them pass by, just like playing movie, let them pass by and don't let them affect you.
concerntrate on something again, do you inhale deep? Focus on your breath. Then do the muscle stuffs.
LOL i do admit to have mild insomnia, over the years i have learned how to put myself to sleep
what im having problem now is waking up in the middle of the night and disrupting my otherwise good night's sleep.
p/s : i love to sigh, BIG SIGHS and that is how i calm myself down, sadly to the annoyance of others
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